Roberto Cavalli Doctor Fringed Distressed-Suede Bag: Handbag of Horrors

What on earth are you going to do with this? Unless you’re a mummy, you’re going to look ridiculous. It’s like an abandoned house where the chandeliers collect so much dust and spider webs that the debris starts to dangle down in a most foreboding way. (I went to a bar like that in New York – McSorley’s Old Ale House. It’s the oldest bar in the city and you can tell because they’ve NEVER cleaned anything in there.) This bag looks so dusty and dingy, I want to shake all the junk off of it. Even the shoulder strap has fringe, so you look like you’re sporting some sort of sad, mop-like cape when you carry it. The gray hue looks more like a filthy white, so it just adds to the macabre effect of this ghostly, ghastly creation. If this bag hasn’t scared you yet (maybe you’ve got a major thing for both haunted houses and fringe) just take a gander at the price: $3,785. Time to run away screaming! On Net-a-Porter for $3,785.